1 post tagged “thanks”

Gosh, I couldn't believe all the comments you all sent concerning the death of my friend's dad.  What a wonderful community we have here!  I honestly don't remember how I stumbled across VOX (do you?), but I'm really glad to have done so because it almost seems like a second family....even from day one!

My friend wanted me to thank you all for the well wishes you have been sending.  I haven't sent them to him yet.  I said that I wanted to wait until all was done, then I would cut and paste them all into an email for him.  And when he felt the need, he could sit down and read both my posting and all your comments about it.  I think it will do his heart good.  I told him that I've had a few postings that received a lot of comments to them, but his story is up there in the top five for the amount of people who wrote something encouraging and telling stories of their own.  The point is, none of you had even HEARD of my friend until that one posting I had put up.  I sometimes mention friends in my Blog, but I had never brought him up.  Like I've said before, I try to make my Blog more for YOU and less about ME.  *smile*  I never intended it to be a personal diary or a place to air my views.  It was always meant to be a place where people could come to relax, laugh, ponder....not to read about the life of Strive2Be.  (But I *do* enjoy those little QotD's and stuff like that.  Lol).

My friend went to work the night he found out about his dad's death....a 12-hour shift.  He needed to focus on something and not stay alone in his apartment.  He works graveyard, and when he got home, we connected up on the webcam and PC phone, and talked and talked....for hours.  Until, amazingly enough, he said that he only had 4 hours left to sleep before he had to get up for work!!!!!!!!!!  We had talked THAT MANY HOURS!!!!!!!!  We both have no idea where all those hours went.  So...we got off the computer and I crashed.  He tried to sleep, but couldn't get any at all during those remaining 4 hours...so he called in to work later on and asked his supervisor if he was needed that night because he hadn't been to sleep for over 24 hours.  And, of course, he was allowed the time off.  He then didn't sleep the rest of the day.  I called him later on the next day, thinking he would be home from work now and unwinding from his shift.  That's when I found out that not only hadn't he gone to work.....but STILL had been awake for over ANOTHER 12 hours.  He said he was scared to miss a phone call.  He didn't know anything about what was being prepared for his dad, and he was scared he'd be so sound asleep that he would miss the call....almost along the same lines as not listening to his messages the other day and thus not getting to the hospital in time to say good-bye to his dad.

I got him to phone his sister today....he shouldn't have to be waiting for a call from anyone else in the family, but get aggressive and find out what they are planning.  As it turns out, she put the obituary in 4 newspapers....but since she did it on her own and didn't brainstorm with any family members...she forgot to mention that their dad was survived by 3 other brothers and 1 sister.  It hasn't been published yet, so she is now hoping she can get that included before it goes to print.  THAT is simply one reason that family pulls together at times like this.  My friend told her something that she hadn't even thought of.

The Wake (the family is Catholic, but I assume that a "Wake" is the same as the Visitation in other religious denominations) will be on Monday April 14th and the funeral on Tuesday April 15th.  He actually has a plot right beside his first wife, who died when my friend was only 4-years old.  Even though he remarried, I find it rather touching that he will be laid to rest beside his first love.

My friend's supervisor is allowing him to have all this time off, even though one is only supposed to officially have 3 days off for a death in the family and the funeral.  I told him there are black areas and white areas in life, but also there are grey areas (which we can never forget and push aside because we MUST stick to the rules).  This is not the same as having a broken big toe and not wanting to work....this is a finality within your life.  Exceptions can definately be made, and if need be, extra shifts can be worked during the course of the year to make up any difference.  You can not possibly punish a man for missing work shifts more than the alloted time due to a death of a family member.  What would that say about humanity??  About how we honor and revere the dignity of life, and the relationships that life had among other people....especially among family?  So my friend is finally getting some sleep....knowing that he doesn't have any responsibilities concerning his job, and also finally having the anxiety removed from wondering and worrying about what the plans were concerning his father.

After all is said and done, I hope to be at my friend's home by the end of next week.  A lot of arrangements have to be made, but I will be his support and he wants me there.  He has no one else.  His family lives all over, and they are not a close family.  And we can talk and cry and laugh and be quiet.  I won't go anywhere unless he asks me to leave.  I want to support this wonderful man, and I'm not going to let him be alone.  I'll give him his privacy when he wants it, and I'll give him my ears and shoulders and soul when he needs it.  I won't leave him to go through this alone.  I just wish I could get there sooner.

And hey....I can still be on VOX from his computer!  I know your address!  LOL!!!!!!!!!! 

Thank you sooo much for all the comments.  I *know* he will appreciate them.  Who would not feel gratified by support from perfect strangers?  The world is full of many compassionate people, and I think they all seem to gravitate towards VOX somehow!  Lol!  Thank you again!!!  And please keep up your prayers for him because he is still very angry and sad and numb.  He has a long road ahead of him.   (((Hugs and kisses)))